I've been forced lately to really look at the relationships in my life and the relationships of those around me. All around my little world, I see people treating each other inexcusably. I know it's part of the human condition, and as a disclaimer, I'll be the first to admit that I can be just as cruel as the next person. But I'll also say in my defense that most of the time, when people accuse me of having done something hurtful, it wasn't on purpose. Maybe it's like that with everyone, but some of the things I've seen lately seem to have no chance of being excused by lack of evil intent.
What is wrong with us as a society? Of course, I was raised with the worldview that everyone is born evil, but I also live in a world that says people can learn how to behave civilly toward each other. So how is it that a person can experience intolerable treatment by another and still visit similar bad behavior on others? I understand that a familiar recourse for victims is to become the victimizer when given the chance. But I think that I personally am strongly driven, and have been since I was a kid, to not treat others with the same judgement, cruelty, and rudeness that my peers treated me with. Why did I decide that was the way to be, and why don't others feel the same way? It seems that lately in my life I've been having to rehash old questions like these that I got over long ago. Things have just been resurfacing that I thought I was done with. A lot of "whys."
My family is socially retarded; I've always known this. But it's beginning to scare me. I've always known I was a social retard, but I've also always struggled to grow past that in any way I can. Now, from watching my family interact with each other, I wonder if I'm doomed to travel down a crazy spiral like my elders. The same goes for Nathan, he comes from pretty crazy stock as well, but this is about me, not him. Are we doomed to become just as crazy as our parents, or is it possible that each successive generation becomes less crazy under the right upbringing?
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7 comments:
the answer to your question is No.
I'll accept that answer.
And I love comments from strangers... they make me feel special and interesting.
Most of the time I believe that people who truly act hurtful toward others are merely trying to justify their existence. Anywho, that's just my opinion.
Dear Christina,
We are all social retards honey.
P.S.
I love you.
P.P.S.
I think that this world is going to hell in a handbasket. I didnt come from a church going family but even I can see it. Overpopulation breeds more of the problems that otherwise might not have been as noticed. Why else do we have a pill for every "social abnormality". I too feel like a royal asshole at times when I talk to people and I dont mean to be..I'm just a dick because I care. I was raised sarcastic and to use my humor when uncomfortable. On the flip side of that I wont even bother to joke with people that I dont like, that includes being witty or sarcastic to them, I usually just tell them off. I know when usually to not overstep bounds but sometimes I dont know if I have. I am not a social butterfly and I think that most of us here arent either, otherwise we all would be out organizing a cheer a thon or a Martha Stewart inspired stitching circle (I might be into that). I'd say you and I are pretty "normal" otherwise to be truly fucked up would be to not consider it at all right? Remember that these are all defense mechanisms because some people really do suck.
Fixed.
I guess I have to agree with both lou and steph. I'm pretty much over the original incidents that spawned this post, but I never really get over stuff, you know? In the end, when you have lifelong relationships, you'll always be answering for a 15 year old crime at the same time you're being held accountable for the one you're presently in hot water for. It's true for my dad, for me, for Nathan, and everyone else.
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